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Dr. Jack Wheeler

CAN PORTER TURN SYRIA ORANGE?

Immediately after the success of Ukraine’s “Orange Revolution,” all the buzz in foreign policy Washington was: to where can we next export it? Russia? Belarus? Azerbaijan? Iran? The answer became blazingly clear this week: Syria. With Syria’s assassination of Rafik Hariri in Beirut on February 14, Porter Goss has been handed a golden opportunity on a platinum platter to expand the Bush Doctrine in the Middle East and get rid of the Assad tyranny. The critical question: is his CIA up to it? Despite the usual denials and red herrings, only Syria could have made the professional hit on Hariri, with 700 pounds of explosives planted under the asphalt after “repairs” a few days before, blowing up his armored convoy as it passed over. The hit was conducted by a Lebanese unit of Syria’s Shu'bat al-Mukhabarat al-'Askariyya, Military Intelligence Service, on the orders of Syrian President Bashar al-Assad’s brother-in-law, Assef Shawkat.

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THE TRILLION DOLLAR SCAM: Kyoto leaves Oil-for-Food in the dust

One of the busiest guys on Capitol for the next six months will be Dana Rohrabacher (R-CA), whom House International Relations Chairman Henry Hyde and House Majority Leader Tom DeLay have put in charge of the new subcommittee on Investigations and Oversight.Dana’s assignment: Expose the entire slimy mess of the UN Oil-for-Food scandal and feed it to the fishes. Doing so will be rewarding for Dana - and frustrating at the same time. For only when his committee is finished gutting Oil-for-Food can he turn to a scandal that leaves it in the dust - the multi-trillion dollar scam of the Kyoto Global Warming Treaty.At the heart of Kyoto is criminally-prosecutable research fraud. This fraud has been used to try and scam hundreds of billions of dollars a year from you and me and all Americans, to try and irreparably damage our economy. The global warming industry is a criminal enterprise, and criminally insane to boot.

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CHENEY AND CONDI

There’s a red-breasted rumor bird that’s been flying around Washington for a while now, but recently it’s been nesting in Capitol Hill. Talk to just about any Congressional Committee Chairman and they’ll tell what this bird has whispered in their ear.

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RIPOSTE TO PYONGYANG: PROVE IT

For every newspaper in the country and around the world this morning, the supersize-font headline is the same: North Korea Admits It Has Nukes!! or a variant thereof. Yet while everyone else is running around like a panicked Chicken Little, the White House remained calm. “This is unfortunate,” Condi sedately pronounced. The most White House spokesman Scott McLellan could rouse himself to say was, “It’s rhetoric we’ve heard before.”Why the insouciance? Because they think North Korea is bluffing. As Donald Rumsfeld put it when queried at NATO meeting in France, yes, the North Korean announcement was a cause for concern, “if you believe them that they have nuclear weapons.”Bush has to go beyond the initial response of calm indifference and there is a debate going on among his advisors as to what that should be. A number are arguing that it should be just two words to Pyongyang: Prove it. Declare that North Korea has to prove its claim of possessing nuclear weapons with a demonstration, and until then its claim will not be taken seriously.That means a test.

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CORTEZ AND QUIXOTE

My friends at the Wall Street Journal told me that Letters Editor Ned Crabb just couldn’t handle my response to the January 25 WSJ editorial “Quixotic Journey,” celebrating the 400th anniversary of Cervantes’ Don Quixote. “Let’s say it went a little bit over his head, Jack,” was how they put it.So here it is for your enjoyment.Dear Ned, The 400th anniversary of the publication of Miguel de Cervantes’ “Don Quixote” is nothing to celebrate. It would be celebrating a curse.

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WHY CONDI IS NOT BLACK

Condoleezza Rice is not only not black, she is not a woman either. Not as far as the Left is concerned. For the Left, if you’re black or a woman, whatever your achievements are, they count only if you got them because you’re black or a woman - not because you deserved them on the basis of your ability. If you got to where you are in life because of your ability and talents irregardless of your race or sex, then you are, for the Left, not “really,” “truly,” or “authentically” black or a woman - like, say, Al Sharpton or Barbara Boxer. Would anybody pay any attention to Al Sharpton if he wasn’t black? Would anybody pay attention to Barbara Boxer if she wasn’t a woman? This is why, if he were alive today, Martin Luther King, Jr. would be a Republican.

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BUSH IN NORWAY

It was about two years ago when I was talking to my friend Tony Blankley of the Washington Times and Fox News, and commented that someday George Bush’s greatness as a president would be compared to Ronald Reagan’s. Tony’s response floored me: “You know, Jack, someday it might be the other way around.” The trifecta of the last two weeks - the Second Inaugural Address, the elections in Iraq, the State of the Union - provide an undeniable demonstration of Tony’s prescience. Yet next December 10 in Oslo, Norway, there will be another undeniable demonstration - this one of undiluted perversity. For on that day, George W. Bush will not be there to be awarded the Nobel Peace Prize.

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ARISTOTLE, EINSTEIN, AND AYN RAND

2005 is a twin-centennial for Rand and Einstein. Today, February 2, is the centennial of Ayn Rand’s birth in 1905. This week, scientists around the world launched a series of commemorations of the centennial of the annus mirabilis, the “miraculous year” of 1905, when a 26 year-old unknown clerk in a Swiss patent office published five papers in an obscure journal that revolutionized science and changed the way we look at the universe. In one of these, “On the Electrodynamics of Moving Bodies,” Einstein introduced his Theory of Special Relativity. Yet this was an incredible misnomer - for what Einstein did was replace one absolute - time - with another - the speed of light. This misnomer is one of the great social tragedies of modern times.

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GLOBAL FREEDOM AND DRUNK COAL MINERS

Notice how quick President Bush’s father was to explain to the press that we don’t have to take seriously what his son said at his second inaugural about “ending tyranny in our world”? Thanks for sharing, Dad. What you really made clear is why you never had a second inaugural yourself.The speechwriter who wrote Bush the Elder’s first and only inaugural address (where he pledged to achieve a “kinder and gentler nation,” and Nancy Reagan exploded in anger, whispering to her husband, “Kinder and gentler than what?”), Peggy Noonan whined once again in the Wall Street Journal today about GW’s “overweening” idealism, and that his speech had no “historical context.” I guess Peggy, like her former boss, didn’t pay much attention to the news last year.Perhaps the most important story of 2004 was the achievement of democracy in so many countries. Every “realist” squish in Washington has the vapors over GW’s suddenly becoming a radically dangerous Lone Ranger cowboy - when what’s really happened is he’s acting on the old political adage that if you discover a parade that’s going where you want, get out in front and lead it. GW’s second inaugural address was the Vision Statement. What is needed now is the Business Plan, how the vision is to be actually implemented. For an insight into Bush’s Business Plan for Ending Tyranny, we can look at the drunk coal miners of Donetsk.

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SHORTING THE EURO

When Ted Turner compared Fox News to Hitler this week, a Fox spokesman commented that “Ted is understandably bitter having lost his ratings, his network, and now his mind - we wish him well.” It is time to feel such sympathy for other famous businessfolk who have similarly lost their minds - such as Warren Buffett.The legendary investment guru has allowed his newly acquired left-wing politics to idiotize him. Just like Turner, he sets up an assumed liberal populism as an envy-deflection device, ends up hating America and the capitalist system that made him wealthy - and becomes a fool in the process.To be clear: only a fool would bet long-range on the euro now.

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JOHNNY AND THE TSANTSA

For years it was a fantasy of mine to be a guest on the Tonight Show. I was writing a book entitled The Adventurer’s Guide, and I fantasized I would appear on the show promoting the book by showing Johnny Carson a tsantsa, a human shrunken head. This fantasy came true on November 16, 1976. I found myself standing behind that famous multi-colored curtain, holding a small black box, and hearing Carson introducing me. Perhaps professional entertainers would not be nervous behind that curtain, but I was almost paralyzed. That old Chinese warning to be careful for what you wish for, as it might come true, hit me hard. So when the curtain parted and I stepped out into the lights, it was in a total daze that I found myself in that chair sitting next to Johnny Carson with 20 million people watching. And with one brief look by Carson into my eyes, the daze was gone. Somehow I felt comfortable and relaxed. Somehow those 20 million people weren’t there, and it was just me and this friendly fellow having a conversation. Johnny Carson had this almost magical ability to put you at ease - on national television. I believe that within almost everyone there is a dream of adventure - a dream of doing something truly memorable, thrilling, and special. Johnny Carson gave me the opportunity to provide encouragement to people so they could fulfill that dream. As millions of Americans commemorate his passing, I’d like to renew that opportunity, and encourage you to get out into the world and follow whatever dream there is inside you.

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TAKING BUSH SERIOUSLY

It must have been a scatological moment for dictators around the world, as they soiled themselves watching George Bush’s inaugural address on global television. They must have known this was coming, for GW has been telegraphing his punches for a long time.That’s why they put all their hopes on GW’s defeat last November. They knew John Kerry would never come after them. Now they know George Bush will.The appropriate reaction to Bush’s Inaugural Address yesterday is: awe-struck. This was a Babe Ruth moment, pointing to where he wanted to hit the ball and swinging for the bleachers. I couldn’t help laughing when I read Peggy Noonan’s petty, small-minded essay in the Wall Street Journal this morning, grouchily complaining about Bush’s “mission inebriation.” She didn’t like the speech because it was so much better than any she wrote for Ronald Reagan.I saw three of Peggy’s former colleagues - White House speechwriters for President Reagan - at one of the Inaugural Balls last night, and they all agreed that Bush’s Second Inaugural will be seen as one of the historically greatest of any American President.So Peggy can cluck, and British newspapers can smirk, but anyone with an ounce of common sense had better start perceiving the reality behind the Left’s myth about GW. You can be sure folks like Hugo Chavez and Aleksandr Lukashenko have no such illusions.For they know, as do their fellow dictators such as Robert Mugabe, Kim Il-Sung, Than Shwe, Ayatollah Khameini, and Fidel Castro, that there is now a bulls-eye painted on them by someone scary-smart and scary-serious who happens to be the most powerful man in the world.

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USE SNOPES!

Has anyone emailed you this picture of the December 26 tsunami hitting Phuket, Thailand? It’s all over the web, yet if you’ve ever been to Phuket, you know this is a fake. The city is actually Antofagasta, Chile with phony Photoshopped waves. We all have friends with the terrible habit of forwarding some shocking claim worthy of National Enquirer on to everyone in their email list, without bothering to check its veracity out first. There’s no need to be upset at them, for they’re excited and just want to share something they think is cool - but now you can tell them how to easily find if any claim is for real or not. Just go to Snopes.

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WE’RE ALL CRIMINALS NOW

I’m writing this from a place called Mea Culpa City. It’s not a lot of fun being here, but it’s where I have to live until I finish this essay. It turns out that I have wronged a friend. The silver - well, pewter - lining is that in attempting to rectify it I learned how easy it has become for the Federales to turn any of us into criminals.The Cato Institute in Washington has just published a book on this: Go Directly To Jail: The Criminalization Of Almost Everything. It documents how the federal government now views its jurisdiction as limitless - which means almost anything you or your business does can be a federal crime. The Cato book paints a frightening picture - but the truth is, it’s much worse.It’s worse because of the depraved collusion between politicians and their buddies in the media to demonize and criminalize someone on the front pages of newspapers. This of course is not exclusive to Washington. States are on to the game as well. New York’s Elliot Spitzer has turned the State Attorney General’s office into his private Gestapo. But he’s New York’s problem. Federal agents and federal politicians are a problem for all of us.

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SARKO VS. EURABIA

My wife just returned from a business trip to Paris last night. She hadn’t been there in a while and was shocked at its transformation. “Where are all the French?” she asked. “Every other person I saw was Arab or North African.” Now she understands how Europe is becoming Eurabia.Yet standing in the way blocking France’s march to cultural doom is a short, wiry fellow with a distinctly un-French name. He’s the most popular politician in France, rock-star popular, married to a beautiful, glamorous model, and the odds-on favorite to be the next President of France. He’s Nicolas Sarkozy - the beloved “Sarko,” as everyone calls him, and he’s part Jewish.

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ARMSTRONG AND ARNAUD

Liberal media journalists are all a-flutter about columnist Armstrong Williams being paid $240,000 by the Department of Education to promote the No Child Left Behind program. They are whipping themselves into a moral dudgeon over a conservative black writer besmirching his journalistic ethics. TMS, the outfit that syndicates Armstrong’s column to papers throughout the country, canceled him.While they are so morally incensed, maybe now these folks can start investigating their brethren who are taking bribes from Saudi Arabia. A year ago last January, the editor-in-chief of the prominent Saudi newspaper Al-Riyadh, Turki Al-Sudairi, disclosed that the Saudi government dispenses millions of dollars a year in bribes to journalists around the world to write articles sympathetic to Saudi Arabia and to attack Israel. French newspapers are virulently anti-Semitic as it is, but Saudi money insures they stay that way. Hundreds of journalists, reporters, commentators, and talking heads from scores of publications and media outlets in dozens of countries are on the Saudi payroll. It’s a very sophisticated operation, and world-wide in scope.That scope includes America - especially America.

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WANT BETTER AND CHEAPER DRUGS?

The most monumental mistake of George W. Bush’s first term was his Medicare Prescription Drug bill. You have read that it is going to cost American taxpayers an estimated $6 trillion. That’s more than the entire current federal debt. But - it is much, much worse than that.Let’s begin with the asinine assumption that in order for the cost to be only six trillion over the next 40 or so years, average American life expectancy will increase by just two years. For the last 125 years, life expectancy in America has been increasing by three months per year. For the last 30 years, as infant mortality rates have shrunk to be statistically marginal, all of the increase has gone to the elderly. By 2050, Americans will be living at least 11-12 years longer than today - which doubles the time folks will collect Medicare (and Social Security) benefits. So now we’re at twelve, not six, trillion in prescription drug costs alone. Yet we are just getting started. George Bush’s bribe of prescription drug “benefits” for old folks who still refused to vote for him in the numbers he expected is going to cost our kids and their kids well over 20 trillion dollars.I can tell you what the solution is - but unless you’re a fan of Milton Friedman and Ludwig von Mises, economists who fully understand how government regulation can ruin a market sector, it will take getting used to.

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AN EAGLE CHRONOLOGY

For some set of reasons I don’t really fathom, my becoming an Eagle Scout at 12 years old disturbs certain people. Out of all the stuff in my bio, this is the thing these folks call into question. Not only do I get emails on it, but there are even debates about it on a number of internet web sites and chat rooms. So to settle this, here’s my chronology of how I made Eagle.

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CHICOMS AND CHAOS

It is a humbling experience to have a deep conversation with a truly great man. Harry Wu has been nominated repeatedly for the Nobel Peace Prize. He is in the same league with Andrei Sakharov, Lech Walesa, Aung San Suu Kyi, and His Holiness the Dalai Lama. It is Harry Wu who deserved the Nobel Peace Prize last year, not a racist kook, Wangari Maathai of Kenya, who believes AIDS was invented by white scientists to exterminate black Africans. When I had lunch with Harry this week, we agreed that China faces chaos - and that the Chicoms will most likely try to cure the chaos with war. The New York Times reports (12/31/04) that there were over 60,000 - sixty thousand - riots, disturbances, and public protests throughout China in 2004. "People can see how corrupt the government is while they barely have enough to eat," a demonstration leader was quoted. "Our society has a short fuse, just waiting for a spark."

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THE TSUNAMI WE NEED

Of all the tsunami pictures I have seen, this one, a wall of water 20 feet high sweeping into Patong Bay, Thailand, best visualizes its horrendous destructive power. What we need now is one like this targeting Turtle Bay, Manhattan to sweep away the United Nations.

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GEORGE BUSH AND THE SWORD OF DAMOCLES: Why There Hasnt Been Another 9-11

There has been a rumor floating in the Washington ether for some time now that George Bush has figured out what Sword of Damocles is suspended over Osama Bin Laden’s head. It’s whispered among Capitol Hill staffers on the intel and armed services committees; White House NSC (National Security Council) members clam up tight if you begin to hint at it; and State Department neo-cons love to give their liberal counterparts cardiac arrhythmia by elliptically conversing about it in their presence. The whispers and hints and ellipses are getting louder now because the rumor explains the inexplicable: Why hasn’t there been a repeat of 9-11? How can it be that after this unimaginable tragedy and Osama’s constant threats of another, we have gone over three years without a single terrorist attack on American soil? The proximate reasons aren’t sufficient: that we have taken the fight to the enemy in Iraq, drawing their attention and energy away from America; that the intel and law-enforcement folks have caught and prevented a number of planned attacks. These are good reasons why there haven’t been more attacks - but they don’t explain why there haven’t been any.

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A NEW YEAR’S REQUEST

To the Point received the following from a friend in the Pentagon:

CHRISTMAS VISITORS They came in single file, about 50 of them. Silent ambassadors, to tell us who they were. They moved at a slow pace, passing us for over 20 minutes. Some walked, while others pushed their wheelchairs as best they could. Some were helped along on crutches by their wives or sweethearts. They were escorted front and rear by US Marines in dress blue uniform. I have never seen prouder Marines. The Amputee Ward from Walter Reed Army Medical Center visited the Pentagon today. Some wore looks of resolution, pride, or dignity. Many had prosthetic devices where limbs used to be. All of them wore looks of surprise. We, the 26,000 employees of the Pentagon, lined both sides of the A ring (the inner ring of the Pentagon) to watch them pass and welcome them with thunderous applause. Half a mile they walked through a gauntlet of grateful fellow citizens two and three deep, who reached out to shake the hands of the remaining good arms or grasp the remaining fingers of hands that have given ultimate service. They walked through us to the main concourse, where they were met by the Army Band and color guard playing martial music for them and where the mall was filled with additional people who swelled the applause. Many of us just called out loudly, "Thank You!" because we didn't know what else could be said; thank you for your service to us. The applause never stopped.None of them spoke. They just cried. So did we.It was the closest I have been to Christmas in a long time.
I have a request that I would like make to you - that you consider supporting these wounded soldiers at Walter Reed in a way that would mean so much to them.The number ONE request at Walter Reed hospital is phone cards. The government doesn't pay long distance phone charges and these wounded soldiers are rationing their calls home. The hospital administrators say they can use an “endless” supply of phone cards so that the wounded soldiers can call their friends and families. A phone card of any amount, even $5 is greatly appreciated. Wal-Mart has good prices on AT&T cards, Sams Club is even better, if you are a member. Just buy a phone card of any amount and send it to:Medical Family Assistance CenterWalter Reed Medical Center6900 Georgia Avenue, NWWashington, DC 20307-5001 Please consider letting everyone you know that they can do the same. It’s one way to give American soldiers who have been wounded in battle fighting to keep terrorism from our shores a happier New Year.

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TSUNAMI SILVER LINING

The coldest night of my life was spent in the Buddhist temple on top of this mountain: 7,360 foot-high Sri Pada in Ceylon. It’s named for the Sacred Footprint of Buddha, a depression in the rock of the summit around which the temple is built. Pilgrims come to watch the sunset and most have the foresight to bring a blanket. Having climbed up from the torrid jungle in only a t-shirt the afternoon before and lacking such foresight, I froze all the way to dawn.Ceylon - or the official name of Sri Lanka, if you prefer - is one of the most entrancing lands on our planet. That such a place of gentle beauty should be visited by such horror as we have seen this week is an undiluted tragedy. For the people of Ceylon and their Indian Ocean neighbors who suffered the monumental horror of a tidal wave coming out of nowhere and washing away their lives, there is no silver lining. Life has the capacity to be utterly tragic with nothing to balance or outweigh it.To argue otherwise would be to demean the suffering of the tsunami’s victims. Yet while there is no silver lining for them, there may be one for us. This numbing event may be humbling enough to teach the egomaniacs of the left that nature is a vastly greater destroyer and alterer of nature than the puny activities of man.The Left is possessed with a peculiarly pathological form of egomania: We human beings are so immensely powerful and so immensely evil that we can threaten the entire earth! It is this nut-case egomania that fuels the religion of environmentalism.

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IT WAS A VERY GOOD YEAR

What a great year. I think, all up and all in, 2004 was a fabulous year for freedom and America. It started out with the Rose Revolution in Georgia, throwing out the Soviet apparatchiks to elect a free market pro-America government, and ended with the Orange Revolution doing the same thing in Ukraine. In between, liberated Afghanistan successfully held its first-ever democratic elections.We got to memorialize for history the greatest American of the 20th century, Ronald Reagan. We re-elected George Bush and inflicted an utterly demoralizing defeat on the George Soros-Michael Moore Democrats. Inflation and unemployment are low, stocks are higher, the economy is humming. We didn’t suffer a single terrorist attack on American soil, took the fight to the terrorists and are close to winning in Iraq. And on top of all of this, Yasser Arafat gave to the world the best possible gift he could give: he died. Frank Sinatra himself couldn’t ask more from a year like 2004.Right, very interesting, thanks Jack for yesterday’s news - what about 2005? That’s what you’re asking, yes?

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A LETTER FROM FALLUJAH

To The Point is honored to have received this letterDear Dr. Wheeler,I am an active duty Colonel in the United States Army, and have just returned from Fallujah, where the fight has been hot. I am also a brand new subscriber to To The Point!Thank you for saying what is in the hearts of our military on the ground in Iraq. Your readers need to know that SECDEF Rumsfeld is held in very high regard by the troops. Our Marines have high morale and all of them have personal body armor, contrary to liberal media lies and distortions.

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A CHRISTMAS LETTER TO ANTI-CHRISTIANS

Merry Christmas. If that offends you, why should I care? It’s your problem, not mine. Let me explain your problem a little more fully. America is a Christian country. It’s your job to deal with that, because you’re not going to change this fact. America has always been a Christian country, and - open wide now, because you’re going to have to swallow this - it will continue to be.It will continue to be because most Americans aren’t Euroweenies. They haven’t lost the moral courage to be proud of their country and their civilization. Notice the “most” - which you are not a part of. You are anti-Christian because you are anti-American. You are anti-American because you are anti-Western Civilization. You are anti-Western Civilization because you are afraid of and intimidated by the envy of the world’s impotent. Fear of being envied defines your soul.

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SAVING SHANGRI-LA

This is Takshang, the Tiger’s Nest Monastery in the Himalayan Kingdom of Bhutan. It is as close a place to the Shangri-La of James Hilton’s 1933 classic “Lost Horizon” as you’ll find on earth today. I took this picture in 1990. About three-quarters the size of West Virginia, wedged between China (more accurately: Chinese-Occupied Tibet) and India, the crest of the Himalayas (highest peak: Kula Kangri at 24,773ft.) forming the northern border and steamy jungles the south, Bhutan is known as the Land of the Thunder Dragon. It is almost a mystical experience to drive and trek across Bhutan, to visit its temples and dzongs (castles), to come over the top of a pass and see a village in the valley below surrounded by brilliant green rice fields, the homes with bright red roofs as they are covered with peppers drying in the sun. Bhutanese culture is a unique mix of the ancient Himalyan animism called Bon and Tibetan Lama Buddhism. All Bhutanese men wear a distinctive robe called a gho, while women wear a female version called a kira. There are few people on our planet more peaceful and gentle than the Bhutanese. They love their country and wish above all for it and their culture to be preserved. They are thus at a loss to comprehend a vicious international campaign to destroy it.

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HALE’S QUADRUPLE

I had dinner with well-known global economist David Hale the other night, and investment guru James Dale Davidson. The conversation was literally all over the map, settling on Ukraine and Romania as two of the brightest prospects for locating brand-new investment opportunities. And Iraq.David was particularly excited about a small company that has just made a large deal in Iraq - more precisely, the Autonomous Region of Iraqi Kurdistan. “I know the company’s principals and have been watching it for some time” David explained. “It’s selling for $7. This thing is an easy quadruple.”

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RESUSCITATING RUSSIA

The Soviet Union was merely the Imperialist Empire of Czarist Russia with Marxism-Leninism as its religious justification. This is why the hope that Russians would embrace freedom and democracy once liberated from Communist tyranny in 1991 was delusional. Their egos, so dependent upon being imperialist masters, collapsed once their colonial subjects were free to stop taking their orders.Yet, the frustrating yet, is that anyone who has spent time with individual Russians knows what wonderful people they can be, what good friends they can be. They can be an enigma wrapped in a riddle, as Churchill observed, but they are nonetheless a Western people, a Christian people belonging to Western Civilization. And for that reason, as well as for our own national security, we must now come to their rescue.If we don’t, China will take over most of what is now Russia. A Chinese Siberia will face us across the Bering Straits.

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CONSERVATIVES ON THE NILE

sphinx.jpg Liberals live in Egypt - on a river called Denial. Yes, it’s an old joke - but it’s to emphasize that there will be no liberals on this adventure. This coming Easter Vacation, I will be taking two dozen conservatives - conservatives only - for a cruise on a luxury yacht to experience the splendor of the Nile. Specifically timed for the week prior to Easter - March 17 to March 26, 2005 - so parents can bring their children, we cruise and dine in luxury while visiting the temples of Karnak and Luxor, the Valley of the Kings with the Tomb of King Tut, the Temple of Horus at Edfu, Aswan and the colossal statues of Ramses and Nefertari at Abu Simbel. In Cairo, we stay at the Four Seasons. Of course we visit the Pyramids, the Sphinx, and the Egyptian Museum - but also Memphis, the capital of Ancient Egypt, and the Step Pyramid of Zoser I at Saqqara (the world’s oldest large stone structure built 5,700 years ago) as well. We’ll have dinner with Egypt’s leading conservative intellectual, Dr. Tarek Heggy, receive a private briefing at the American Embassy, meet with the leaders of the Coptic Christian community, and pray in a Coptic Christian church on Good Friday. By Saturday evening you’ll be back in America to wake up at home on Easter Sunday. Only eight couples and families will be able to accompany me and I am giving first priority to Members of To The Point. Such priority will not last long. The opportunity to participate in this memorable adventure will soon pass. To register, contact us at [email protected]. I know you have promised yourself that “once in my life” you’ll cruise the Nile and see the Pyramids. To be a part of this special experience with your fellow conservatives, we urge you to contact us immediately. The full itinerary, lots of pictures, and booking information can be found at the Wheeler Expeditions website ( www.wheelerexpeditions.com. Just a few days ago, I received a very interesting memo from my contacts within the Egyptian government. Egyptian President Hosni Mubarak, I’m told, is determined to achieve a breakthrough in Egypt’s relations with Israel, both politically and economically. This is part of Mubarak’s goal for Egypt to have a 21st century economy and peaceful political system. There couldn’t be a more important or exciting time to visit Egypt. I hope you’ll be able to join me to be one of the Conservatives on the Nile.

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ON A ROLL FROM KABUL TO BAGHDAD

I had a chance to visit with Porter Goss after he returned from Afghanistan last week. He was there to make personally sure everything was solidly OK for Dick Cheney and Donald Rumsfeld to attend Karzai’s inaugural in Kabul.He got the biggest kick when I told him there’s a name in town for what he’s doing to the CIA: Gossification. I got a big thumbs up when I said, “Now we have to make sure Condi gossifies the State Department.”Then he gave his assessment of how we’re doing in Afghanistan: “Jack, I’m telling you, the place is humming, it’s sizzling. People have so much energy, they are so excited about their future. We have a fantastic success story in the making here, a tremendous victory for America and for the Afghan people. Funny how you never hear about it in the media, huh?”Yes, big surprise to the both of us. All we hear about is the latest disasters in Iraq, and nothing about Afghanistan any more - because we’re winning.Porter easily read my mind. “You know, Jack, it’s going to be the same in Iraq. We’re winning - and the media can’t stand it that we’re on a roll from Kabul to Baghdad.”

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SOLVING SOCIAL SECURITY AND ENERGY INDEPENDENCE AT THE SAME TIME

When I mentioned to Interior Secretary Gale Norton at the White House Christmas Party this week that she was the key to solving Social Security and US energy independence - both at the same time - you can imagine how much her eyes widened. “I am?” she responded with wonderment and her beautiful smile."You sure are," I said. "Here's how..."

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SHAKESPEARE IN VENEZUELA

While the focus of the world is on Ukraine, Putin’s Russia, Iraq, nukes in Iran, et al, it has become obvious to a small number of folks in Washington that the world’s most dangerous man is not in any of these places and is off most everyone’s radar scope: Hugo Chavez in Venezuela.Imagine Fidel Castro in the prime of his life with billions of dollars of oil money. Given his pathological hatred of America, what do you think he would spend his money on? Suppose he thought the President of the United States was trying to knock him off - how do you think he would respond?

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PIGS IN TIBET

potala2.jpg I took this picture of the Potala on my first expedition across Tibet in 1986. Even though I’ve since logged over 10,000 kilometers criss-crossing Tibet, it is always a fantastic thrill to see one of man’s great architectural masterpieces, built seven centuries ago high on the Tibetan Plateau. It is no thrill, however, for Tibetans. For them, the Potala is “dead,” for the Dalai Lama no longer lives there. The Potala is instead a bitter reminder to Tibetans that their country has been stolen, that they are slaves to their masters, the Chinese.

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THE TYRANNY OF CHINA’S HISTORY

Chinese, written and spoken, is my candidate for the weirdest major language on earth. At the Monterey Institute, where US diplomats are taught foreign languages, it takes on average 600 hours of instruction to be fluent in a European language such as French or German, 1200 for Arabic - and 2400 in Chinese. (This means, of course, that for China and the world to communicate, Chinese must speak English, as the world will never speak Chinese). Beyond the technical difficulties lie far deeper problems, resulting in a grossly myopic view of China’s history and future. The one buried most deeply is the way Chinese grammar reverses time: the past, in Chinese, is in front of or before you, while the future is behind you. Chinese culture is oriented towards the past, reading Chinese history through a distorted lens, and stubbornly attempting to apply illusory lessons to the present. This is precisely what China’s military and government leaders are doing with their strategy towards America.

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FIXING THE BLUE STATES

We’ve all had a good laugh at the moonbat barking of Blue State Liberals about seceding from Red State America. To keep the fun going, let’s flip the secession meme around and talk about red counties seceding from the blue states in which they are politically imprisoned. For it turns out that part of one state can secede from that state and be annexed by another. Think of what this could portend. Red counties in blue states could tell their neighbor blue counties they don’t have to put up with bible-thumping racist redneck homophobe ignoramuses too dense not to understand that liberals are a superior form of human evolution with the moral authority to demand blind obedience. California, Oregon, and Washington would be coastal strips, with the rest of these states happily in low-tax Nevada or Idaho. Or the other way around, maybe Chicago could bail from Illinois and leave the rest of the state alone, just as New York City could with New York. At the very least, such possibilities could sober up Blue Staters regarding silly secessionist threats. What should sober them up further is how the Republicans are going to shrink the number of blue counties. Here’s the post-election analysis of Karl Rove’s Inner Circle:

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WE’RE ALL WINNERS

Just like Al Gore, John Kerry’s most human moment during his entire campaign for the presidency was his concession speech. As I sat crying in relief that it was over and we had won, I heard him say something I will never forget. He said that no matter who you voted for, we’re all winners:

In an American election, there are no losers, because whether or not our candidates are successful, the next morning we all wake up as Americans. And that is the greatest privilege and the most remarkable good fortune that can come to us on earth.
That is one of the most moving statements I have ever heard from any politician, conservative or liberal, Republican or Democrat, right or left. All my life, I have always thought it was the coolest thing on planet Earth to be an American. I have been to something close to 200 countries and political jurisdictions in the world, and whenever someone asks me, “Where are you from?” it is a special thrill to be able to answer, “America - I’m an American.” Thanksgiving is the unique American holiday. We share Christmas and Easter with every other Christian nation. Most every country celebrates its Independence Day, and the birthdays of their founding heroes. Thanksgiving is ours, where we give our deepest thanks to Providence for the extraordinary gift of America to mankind.

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KATHY’S DREAM, KATHY’S CLOWN

It was in 1983 in Paris that I met my first Russian dissidents. They were rabidly Anti-Communist and passionately argued for freedom and democracy for Russia. Impressed, I nonetheless put them to the test. “What about the other internal colonies of the Soviet Union?” I asked. “I take it that you all advocate freedom and democracy for, say, Ukraine, as well, right?” My inquiry went through them like a jolt of angry electricity. “Ukraine is a part of Russia!” they exploded. “Ukraine has been a part of Russia for centuries! Ukraine will always be a part of Russia!” I couldn’t resist smiling and informing them: “Not for long…” I subsequently made a number of trips into Soviet Ukraine in the 1980s to meet with the leaders of Rukh, the emerging democracy-resistance movement -- Mykhailo Horyn in Lviv and Vyacheslav Chornovil in Kiev. These meetings were arranged by a dynamic young Ukrainian-American lady in the Human Rights section of the State Department named Kathy Chumachenko.

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CHAVEZ IN CHILE?

This picture of Teddy Roosevelt is a family heirloom. The reason is that the man standing in front of TR is the Chief of the Secret Service Presidential Bodyguard - my grandfather Lucien C. Wheeler.Lucien was with the Secret Service guarding the lives of four presidents (TR, Taft, Wilson, and Harding). He admired and revered TR above all. While he passed on many years ago, I feel quite sure he would feel the same towards GW. George W. Bush is a man’s president, just like Teddy Roosevelt.Lucien would also have been extremely alarmed at what happened regarding the president in Chile last Saturday, November 20. However much Lucien would have delighted in GW’s rescuing his Secret Service counterpart from the Chilean police, and laughed over the Chilean newspapers denouncing GW for “behaving like John Wayne” (“Don’t those fools understand that John Wayne is a hero to Americans?” I can hear him asking), he would also have immediately suspected something far more sinister than the puffed-up egos of Chilean security officials.His suspicion would have quickly zeroed in on Hugo Chavez, dictator of Venezuela.

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THE GODS AND HEROES TRIATHLON

As most of you know, I have an expedition company called Wheeler Expeditions. The expeditions I run myself are mostly for private clients. I am very proud to say that my son, Brandon, has joined me in the business - and he has conceived and organized an amazing adventure which he calls The Gods and Heroes Triathlon.Next June, Brandon will lead 16 young and young-at-heart adventurers to: Swim the Hellespont like legendary Leander in Greek mythology (the Hellespont, now in Turkey, is the straits separating Europe from Asia and is where the Trojan War was fought)…Climb Mount Olympus to the home of the Greek gods…Run the original Marathon of 490 BC in the footsteps of Pheidippides.You’ve got to admit that is seriously cool. Brandon has also included visits to Meteora, where Christian monks in the Middle Ages built monasteries atop giant rock spires, Delphi, the center of the Greek spiritual world, and of course Athens, to explore the Acropolis and party at the Plaka.Brandon wants this to be a Fun Triathlon - not a competitive one. The object is to have as much fun as possible experiencing and recreating the most legendary athletic achievements in history.Yes, you have to be in good shape. But this is a personal challenge, a personal adventure. The goal is to participate in history, not compete against it. It is not to compete against one’s fellow adventurers, but to share legendary experiences together that everyone will never forget for the rest of their lives.If you (or anyone you know) would like to make these epic feats and legends of history a part of your (or their) life, the full itinerary is on the Wheeler Expeditions website.

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