KERRY+HILLARY? FORGET IT.

There was an arresting line in a recent AP article speculating on Kerry’s VP choices: that he would need to pick a running mate with less charisma than him. That’s a very tall order. Kerry is Algore without the charm. How is it humanly possible to have less charisma, less electric star-power, than Torricelli John? You can immediately see why Hillary can’t be on the ticket. She’d outshine him like the sun does the moon.

My buddy Dennis Beck told me a funny story once, about his brother winning an Academy Award (for special effects). He was on the stage, made the speech, got the Oscar, with his presenter Sandra Bullock. Backstage at the press reception, there he was proudly holding his Oscar with Sandra Bullock at his side. So of course the press completely ignored him and his award — all they wanted was to talk to Sandra the Movie Star.

If Kerry picks Hillary, he’ll be an epiphenomenon, he’ll be Dennis’ brother with the press totally focused on Hillary. So you can kiss that combo goodbye. Choosing somebody duller than him will be tough. Let’s see if he’s up to the task.