KNOW WHERE YOU STAND AND STAND THERE

I was, of course, hoping to write a celebratory column today. We are in for some trouble over the next four years, and each of us should be aware of the reality facing us, and accepting of the circumstances. By accepting I do not mean that we like it, or that we make believe that it’s just fine. I simply mean that the truth is the truth, and we all function better when we accept this fact of life.

In every area of life, there are things we have control over or influence on, and many more things that we do not. I have no control over what a debate moderator does, but I can ridicule the obvious bias; I have no control over how other people vote, but I can know my principles, speak my mind, and seek to build bridges of influence rather than repelling people with ad hominem attacks.

Knowing your principles is a profound act. It gives you calm in a storm, and guidance where there are few landmarks by which to steer. One major reason that we dread the thought of four more years of an Obama presidency is that his principles are dysfunctional – and so America will be led by a man whose principles will not solve our problems, or enhance our strengths.

Today, so that we can remember our principles, and in so doing become stronger, more resilient, and more effective in maintaining our republic over time, I want to identify several of the principles that Obama has wrong, and that we have right.

·         The General Will: Jean Jacques Rousseau, more than any other single figure in history, is responsible for the horrors perpetrated by the left – from the French Reign of Terror during their revolution, to the monstrous communist and Fascist regimes of the 20^th century, one idea has led mankind into the abyss: the idea that the population as a whole has wisdom that must supersede the wisdom of the individual. The contrasting principle is Individualism: the idea that your mind is your own, your life is your own, and you and I each may – and must – use our own mind, and take responsibility for our own thoughts and actions.

·         It is the function of intellectuals to make people better – by force: Eric Hoffer said it better than I can, in The Ordeal of Change: "Intellectuals do not produce anything tangible, so it is more difficult for them to get the concrete satisfaction of making something happen that drives businessmen and other people who make comcrete yet limited things happen. So intellectuals are more driven to have to reach for abstract and theoretical goals that are more grandiose to make up for the lack of tangible accomplishments. This is why the intellectual class leans left/fascist. They need something big to justify their existence."

·         America is responsible for the world’s ills: this is the one that most troubles me. We can overcome our internal domestic mistakes and damage with new leadership that is devoted to our founding principles. It will take time, but it is doable. This principle endangers the world, and threatens to leave a vacuum where America’s mostly benevolent leadership has been moving the world toward greater freedom and peace. On the plus side, Obama’s weakness in this area is also forcing some of our allies to grow up and step up. That is a risky business, but over time, if we regain strong and good leadership in four years, that leader may have stronger allies with which to work. We’ll see.

·         If somebody disagrees with you he is your enemy: This is at the root of Obama’s Saul Alynsky-inspired divide and conquer strategy. Unlike Reagan or Clinton, Obama has no desire or capacity to interact with, much less listen to, those whose ideas he disagrees with. This weakens him tremendously as a leader, and creates the atmosphere or division and bitterness that is the hallmark of his presidency. We must not fall into this trap.

Obama does not care to listen to opposing views, but that does not mean that your neighbor, your co-worker, your assemblyman or mayor feels the same way. Thomas Paine has said that if I oppose a man’s freedom of speech, I preclude myself forever of the right to change my mind. Minds need to be changed, and they will not be changed by force – they must be changed by persuasion, and persuasion begins with respect, empathy, and goodwill. You have no power of persuasion toward a man whom you despise; you have no power of persuasion through badgering or lecturing; persuasion is something that comes through relationship, not through bullying.

·         Racial problems are improved through constantly reminding people of racial problems: exactly the opposite is the case. When Bill Cosby starred in the TV show I Spy, back in the 60’s, he and his co-star, Robert Culp made an agreement – race was not to be explicitly referred to. For all anybody could tell on that show, these were two competent, clever spies working effectively as a team. That one of them was black and one white was not made an issue. Their relationship, their effectiveness, and their spirit together spoke for itself.

They had it exactly right. As I wrote about in Race, if race is not made an issue, and if there is some other focus of cooperation – a work task, a common goal – race ceases to be an issue within 4 minutes. Obama’s and his surrogate’s constant allusions to race only serve to rip the scab off of old wounds, keeping them from healing, preventing them from taking their proper place in history.

·         I am my brother’s keeper, and this principle must be implemented through force: This is a specific application of the "making people better" principle above, and it is dead wrong. When you help somebody because you want to help them, both parties benefit emotionally, and significantly. When you help somebody because you are forced to, both parties suffer emotionally – you feel resentful, and the recipient feels entitled, and will tend to wonder why you didn’t give more.

Expressing kindness is one of the great joys of life; it is the fastest and most reliable path to feeling good immediately, and this joy is something that spreads in the doing. Introducing force into the equation disconnects you from each other, and makes your relationship one of differences and bitterness.

There are more of these principles, of course, and more detailed specific programs – taxing the rich, growing entitlements, demonizing business, trashing traditional values – but many of them fall under these larger principles above, and I don’t have space to list them all here.

The main point is that what each of us must do from this point on, is to learn, grow, and explore exactly what your principles are. Don’t just memorize slogans, understand those principles; read, learn, pray, meditate, and think deeply upon what you believe and why.

Understand those principles so that you can stand on them without getting blown here and there by the winds of adversity and acrimony; and, knowing your principles, act in accordance with them. Have your principles be your life’s center. Seek to integrate those principles into your thoughts, words, and actions, so that you can speak your mind and act upon them with comfort and ease, without getting thrown into bitterness or attack. Know your principles, speak your principles, and live your principles, and you will have your strongest impact possible on the world.

Presidents come and go; elections go toward or away from what we would like; the pendulum swings. You have the right and the personal obligation – for your own soul, and for the benevolent effect you can have upon others – to live according to your deepest principles, and to search for the most effective and positive expression of those principles throughout your life.

The truth is the truth. Acknowledge it, accept it, and devote yourself to live effectively in the world as it is now.

Enter the New Year with the tools to develop new habits for a fantastic year; join me for an exciting new Mastering Happiness Teleclass; the next one begins the second week in January

Don’t make New Year’s resolutions! Not like you have in the past. Let’s start 2013 off with practical, effective tools for setting fresh and inspiring goals that will take us toward a more meaningful and satisfying life – not imaginary, wishful thinking, but real, down to earth skills for mastering your own habits, and your own happiness.

In this class, you will not only learn principles of living a happier life, you will learn how to set and fulfill your goals, how to practice what you do to achieve excellence, and how to effectively use your willpower and mindsets to create a more effective life.

Cost is $400. The class will be interactive, with homework and handouts to supplement the learning and takeaways. E-mail me at [email protected]  to sign up. There is a sign up page at my website, drjoelwade.com.

The teleclass will be taped and available for the class if there is an absence.

Class is limited to fifteen participants. The 90-minute teleclass will be held on four consecutive weeks:

 JANUARY TUESDAY MORNING CLASSES

·         Tuesday, Jan. 8^th at 9 am PST (noon EST)
·         Tuesday, Jan. 15^th at 9 am PST
·         Tuesday, Jan. 22^nd at 9 am PST
·         Tuesday, Jan. 29^th, at 9 am PST

JANUARY WENESDAY EVENING CLASSES

• Wednesday, Jan. 9th at 5 pm PST (8 pm EST)
• Wednesday, Jan. 16th at 5 pm PST
• Wednesday, Jan. 23rd at 5 pm PST
• Wednesday, Jan. 30th at 5 pm PST