COULTER AND THE BRECK BOY

Ann Coulter's famously calling Democrat presidential candidate John Edwards a "faggot" at the CPAC conference here in Washington earlier this month has scandalized a great many conservatives and every single Republican candidate.

It was brilliant.

That's a description, not approval.  I winced when I heard the forbidden word, not because it's forbidden but because it's so hurtful.  It's purposefully demeaning to homosexuals, especially to those who really can't help what they are.

Yet Ann's use of the term was diabolically clever, for with it she accomplished her goal:  demolishing Edwards' candidacy.  With this one single word, she made sure John Edwards will never be elected President of the United States.

She knew exactly what she was doing.

Her target was not homosexuals, it was Edwards – as we can see from her telling the New York Times, "C'mon, it was a joke. I would never insult gays by suggesting that they are like John Edwards. That would be mean."

The last thing she was doing was saying John Edwards is a homosexual – of course he isn't, she and everyone else knows that.  She was saying he is a metrosexual sissy-boy girlieman, the opposite of a mensch, the last sort of fellow you'd want to protect your country from maniacal Moslem killers and other assorted anti-American crazies.

But if she had used any of those terms, her comment would have been immediately forgotten and ignored.  By using a forbidden scandalous term instead, she stuck it unforgettably into people's brains.  For millions of people now and forever, whenever they see or hear or read about John Edwards, that word will echo subliminally in their mind.

And just like that – with one single word – he's toast.  Finita la musica.  The music is over for the Breck Boy.

We have called him the Breck Boy since he was Kerry's running mate in 2004 because of the legendary John Edwards Hair Video.

It shows him primping for a television campaign commercial.  The endless extent to which he obsessively fusses with his hair is hilarious and spooky – funny and really creepy at the same time.

You could talk all day about how he's a lightweight narcissist, a trial lawyer ambulance chaser who made millions persuading juries he can hear the thoughts of dead babies in his head, an envy-pandering hypocrite who talks about Two Americas while living in a 28,000 square foot mansion, a one term ex-Senator with no record of accomplishment and a brain devoid of original ideas.

All of this wouldn't register as deeply and emotionally as Coulter's one word.  Talk about taking care of business. 

Now if she would only use her diabolical cleverness to emasculate folks more dangerous than girliemen.  We provided a suggestion last June in Ann's Next Book – which should be entitled Moslem Men Have Little Dicks.

After you read "Ann's Next Book," if you think it's about time she started focusing on America's real enemies instead of pantywaist liberals, you can make that request to her literary agent, Suzanne Gluck at the William Morris Agency in New York.

You can email Ms. Gluck at either [email protected] or [email protected]. 

By clicking on the envelope icon in the top right corner, you can email Ann's Next Book to Ms. Gluck.  You can do the same for the article that prompted it, Terrorism and Tiny Zibbs.

While "Ann's Next Book" is a Humor File, "Terrorism and Tiny Zibbs" is serious.  And it is about time Ann got serious about taking on Islamofascism.

It turns out that the most courageous people in the world challenging Islamofascism right now are women – like Brigitte Gabriel, Ayaan Hirsi Ali, and Nonie Darwish.  Wouldn't it be great if Ann Coulter teamed up with them?

Together, they could write a book, The Four Horsewomen of the Anti-Islamofascist Apocalypse.

Ideal for a literary agent like Suzanne Gluck.  Let her know what you think.