SHUT DOWN

Tach it up, tach it up, buddy gonna shut you down.

Growing up in Southern California in the 1950s and 60s, my favorite Beach Boys song was Shut Down, released in 1963. Every time I hear it on a Golden Oldies station, it brings back memories of all the teen-age street drag races I had in my ’52 K2 Allard with a dual-carb 350hp Cadillac engine.

And so I found myself singing the lyrics of the Beach Boys’ ode to street racing as I was reading the text of President Bush’s speech to the Republican Governors Association here in Washington earlier this week.

It happened on the strip where the road is wide
Two cool shorts standin’ side by side
My fuel-injected Sting Ray and a Four-Thirteen
We’re revvin’ up our engines and it sounds real mean
Tach it up, tach it up, buddy gonna shut you down

For months now, all the political excitement and attention has been about the Dem Primaries. For months, the headlines have been carrying Dem Dwarf bashes of Bush, screaming media-hyped WMD red herrings, or creating ersatz scandals over GW’s National Guard service. This has resulted in some polls showing Hanoi John Kerry out in front of the President.

Declining numbers at an even rate
At the count of one we both accelerate
My Sting Ray’s light, the slicks are startin’ to spin
But the Four-Thirteen’s really digging in

All the while, GW waits and lets them take their best shots. Finally, this week, he fires off his opening salvo.

Gotta be cool now — power shift, here it goes…

“We meet,” GW told the Republican Governors, “during the presidential primary season. We’re witnessing a clear trend — it looks like we have a winner in the Republican primaries. (Laughter and applause.) The other party’s nomination battle is still playing out. The candidates are an interesting group, with diverse opinions: For tax cuts, and against them. For NAFTA, and against NAFTA. For the Patriot Act, and against the Patriot Act. In favor of liberating Iraq, and opposed to it. And that’s just one Senator from Massachusetts…”

Well, the Superstock Dodge is windin’ out in low
But my fuel-injected Sting-Ray’s really startin’ to go
To get the traction I’m ridin’ the clutch
The pressure plate’s burnin’ — this machine’s too much

What are the Democrats thinking?!? You don’t get more phony than John Kerry, with his Band-Aid Purple Hearts (he lost a combined total of two days’ duty for all three) and fake Silver Star (for killing a single defenseless man already blown half-apart by .50 cal machine gun bullets — see this week’s Guest Editorial, “Kerry and the Swift Boats”).

Take a look at the cover of his “American-soldiers-are war-criminals” 1971 book with bearded Ché wannabes carrying the America flag upside down. This is the guy, the author of this book, a kept-man gigolo married to wealthy heiresses who is to the left of Ted Kennedy and hasn’t an original thought in his brain, that the Dem-Dems — the Demagogue Democrats — are choosing as their champion to take on the President of the United States? Has their bitterness and desperation driven them that insane?

Pedal’s to the floor, hear his two quads quake
Now the Four-Thirteen’s lead is startin’ to break
He’s hot with ram-induction but it’s understood
I got a fuel-injected engine sittin’ under my hood

The Democrats are going to learn the most awful lesson in Einsteinian physics and the relativity of time. It will take about a century and a-half for them to get to November. GW is going to cut up their nominee into nano-slices so much over the intervening months they will end up praying for the ordeal just to be over.

The Alphabet Media will do their frantic best to invent more sham scandals besmirching the President and to puff up Hanoi John. There will be an endless stream of Disraeli Polls (statistics in politics as just another form of lying) showing the Gigolo Man has a chance. But at the end of the day on November 2, Kerry will be lucky if he carried Massachusetts.

Shut it off, shut it off — buddy now I shut you down
Shut it off, shut it off — buddy now I shut you down

The President’s speech in full is here

Remember this is just his opening round. The second salvo was fired off the next day announcing his support for the Federal Marriage Amendment. GW is locked, cocked, and ready to rock. Is there a doctor in the House of Democrats who knows how to treat shell-shock?